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Arti Honrao


SFTH will be updated in second week of December.

27.10.09

Taking It Easy…

There are so many times in Life when we face situations when people tell us, “take it easy”. So many times we say the same thing to other people. “take it easy”

What do you actually mean by that? Take It Easy? Is it really easy to take it easy when Life throws difficult situations at us? What do we have to do to take it easy? Sit, relax, take deep breaths? Expect that Life will solve the problem on its own?

Believe me, taking it easy is really difficult task and frustrating, right when we have to do it. We do not like it when people say that to us. We turn to those people who listen to us, listen to what we have to say without sharing their two cents, we love talking to those who sympathize with us. As if “that” is really going to help. I think, yes, it does help. How so? When someone is frustrated, by default his listening system goes on strike. The system goes into hibernation, if not shut down. The best thing to do at such times is just listen to what that person has to say. Sympathizing can at times act as double-edged sword, so best … just listen. Sometimes, listening to someone would help that person in ways we can never imagine. I have had my own experiences. Both as giver and taker of sharing information business. It Helps.

This is the reason, I feel “take it easy” is an advice we need to give to ourselves as listeners rather than to the person going through the bad phase. Listen when the person wants to vent out, because anyways he is not going to understand what you are saying.

Then, as you feel the right time has come - “the person has taken it easy” you can share your two cents. Normally, these are the best times a person will understand what is being said even if we tell him that he was the one who was on the wrong side. Of course, a lot depends on “how “ you say it.

Recently, I had such an experience. A friend called me up to tell me something he was going through. A bad phase. I allowed him to vent out for as much time as he wanted to. I listened and he thanked me for understanding and supporting him. Then – after two days I explained what I actually felt about the whole situation. I told him how he was the one who was on the wrong side and whatever amendments were to be made had to be made by him. I was amazed by how quick he was to understand what I told him. He agreed to all that I said and admitted that he would have not understood it had I told him two days ago.

So, whenever you say “Take It Easy” to someone, think twice. Perhaps you need it more than the person trapped in bad situation. You need to take it easy and hold back the reins of the horse named advice.



My two cents.




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15 comments:

Aniket Kulkarni said...

Good post :) Definitely helped to tweak my approach towards being a good listener, than just being a good advisor.

Markandey said...

Good one!!
I love conclusive BlogPosts like this. 

Arti Honrao said...

Thanks, Aniket.



Good to hear that this post made you think...







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Arti

Arti Honrao said...

Thanks, Markandey.

Glad you liked this post. However, please do remember - sometimes inconclusive posts are necessary too especially if you intend to learn about a particular subject!


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Arti

aurora said...

This is sound advice! :)  

Markandey said...

I click 'I Agree' button. 

Arti Honrao said...

I send a "thank you" note ;)



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Arti

Arti Honrao said...

Thank you, Aurora.
I just tried to share what I learned.


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Arti

Sourish said...

take it easy :D...lol...I guess people...have this line ready for almost anything...i guess it is sumthing like mujhe nhi pata ki kya karna hai but I m with you on this... :)

Arti Honrao said...

Yes, almost everything! :)

Thanks, Sourish


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Arti Di

venuss66 said...

Yeah...it's so easy to say 'Take it easy'
I am with you, Arti.

Arti Honrao said...

:)  And, we use it so much that at times it loses its meaning.


Thanks, Venus



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Arti Honrao said...

Thank you for your comment, oRange.
True, no one but the person going though a bad phase can really understand what it feels like.


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Kirti said...

<span style=" line-height: 19px;">Yes absolutely right and i also agree with you that any damn emotion or say any concern exaggerated or expressed beyond a certain limit loses its meaning... And its very important to listen. But even that is an art, though difficult, its not at all impossible... 
 
</span>
<span style=""><span style=""><span style="color: #000000; line-height: 19px;">keep writing on such realistic topics... enjoyed reading it! </span></span></span>

:)

Arti Honrao said...

<span style=" line-height: 19px;">Thanks, Kirti. 
 
Right, sometimes the best we can do for someone is "just listen" 
 
I am glad you enjoyed reading it. 
 
GBU 
Arti</span>